Podcast by Christopher White and Max Thomas
16 March 2026
In this episode of Addicted to Recovery, hosts Christopher White and Max Thomas speak with their friend Dev about his personal journey through addiction, relapse, and recovery.
Dev describes growing up in a loving and stable home in Watford with both parents and a younger brother. Despite having a supportive upbringing and no major trauma, he often felt uncomfortable in his own skin and struggled with low self-esteem. From a young age he craved approval and wanted to be liked, particularly by his father.
Looking back, Dev recognises that addictive patterns were present long before he ever used drugs. As a child he displayed obsessive behaviours such as overeating and compulsively collecting items like Pokémon cards and football stickers. These behaviours were ways of coping with uncomfortable feelings.
Dev first used cannabis in secondary school. Although he initially disliked the feeling, he continued using because it helped him fit in socially. Being part of a group that used drugs gave him a sense of belonging and attention he had always sought.
Over time his drug use expanded to alcohol, ecstasy and cocaine. Selling drugs at school gave him a sense of power and popularity, which reinforced his lifestyle and pushed him deeper into addiction.
As Dev’s addiction progressed, the consequences became severe. He experienced multiple prison sentences, legal trouble, job loss, and broken relationships. At one point he overdosed after taking MDMA at a rave and woke up in hospital days later with no memory of the event.
Even after these frightening experiences, he continued using, showing how powerful addiction can be.
When Dev’s daughter was born, he experienced a powerful emotional shift. Holding her for the first time made him determined to become a better father and stop using drugs.
However, despite his genuine desire to change, he discovered that willpower alone was not enough. Without understanding addiction or having support, he quickly fell back into old patterns.
Dev eventually entered treatment at the Lighthouse recovery centre, where he began to understand addiction for the first time. Hearing others share similar experiences helped him realise he was not alone.
He started attending Narcotics Anonymous meetings and became part of a recovery community. While he experienced periods of sobriety, his journey included setbacks, dishonesty, and relapse before he began to fully engage with the recovery process.
After achieving three and a half years clean, Dev relapsed and lost many of the things he had built in his life. Returning to recovery was difficult, and he struggled emotionally.
During this time he began attending church and exploring faith. In October he committed his life to Christianity and was later baptised in December. He describes this spiritual awakening as a major turning point in his recovery, helping him find inner peace and purpose.
Today Dev has eight and a half months clean and lives a calmer, more balanced life. He maintains a strong relationship with his daughter and works in supported housing helping men in recovery.
He emphasises that recovery requires honesty, service to others, community support, and a spiritual foundation.
Dev’s story demonstrates that addiction can affect anyone, regardless of background, and that recovery often involves setbacks before lasting change occurs. Through community, faith, and helping others, he has built a new life grounded in purpose and compassion.
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09 March 2026
In this episode of Addicted to Recovery, the hosts speak with Tony, who shares his powerful life story of addiction, trauma, and ultimately recovery.
Tony grew up on a council estate in East London, raised by hardworking parents alongside his brother and sister. When Tony was young, his sister was tragically run over and lost her leg, an event that deeply impacted the family. Although the trauma was never openly discussed, Tony believes it contributed to his father becoming a heavy drinker and created an emotionally difficult home environment. tony
As a child, Tony found escape and confidence through football, where he excelled and even attracted interest from professional clubs like Arsenal and West Ham. On the pitch he felt confident and valued, but off the pitch he struggled with insecurity and fear, particularly within the challenging environment of the council estate. tony
Tony began experimenting with substances at a young age. What started with cigarettes and cannabis gradually escalated into more serious drug use as he searched for relief from feelings of inadequacy and anxiety. Eventually, he discovered heroin, which he describes as providing the first true sense of internal peace and comfort he had ever experienced. tony
However, this relief quickly turned into a decades-long addiction. Tony spent nearly 30 years using Class A drugs, trapped in a cycle of crime, desperation, and daily survival. His addiction caused immense pain to his family, including witnessing the death of his brother at 26, which still wasn’t enough to stop his own addiction at the time. tony
Eventually, after years of despair and failed attempts to quit, Tony reached a point where he internally knew he needed help. Through the criminal justice system, he entered a 12-step rehabilitation program, where he finally found hope. Seeing counselors and other recovering addicts who had transformed their lives inspired him to believe recovery was possible. tony
Tony embraced treatment, completed rehab, and began working the 12-step recovery program. Through this process he developed self-awareness, confronted past trauma, and rebuilt his life.
Today Tony has been clean for over 11 years and now uses his experience to help others struggling with addiction. His story highlights how unresolved trauma, emotional pain, and the search for belonging can lead people into addiction — but also how connection, honesty, and recovery communities can help people rebuild their lives.
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02 March 2026
DJ Ross Mack joins Addicted to Recovery to share his powerful journey from the heights of the nightlife industry to the depths of addiction — and back again.
From DJing major clubs like Opium Lounge, The Warehouse, Funky Buddha and playing internationally, Ross lived the fast-paced lifestyle of music, money, women and substances. Behind the decks he looked in control — but behind closed doors his addiction was spiralling into isolation, paranoia and darkness.
In this episode, Ross opens up about:
Ross speaks honestly about paranoia, using alone in hotel rooms, chasing the illusion of the “champagne lifestyle,” and how addiction is far more powerful than love or ambition.
This episode is raw, relatable and hopeful — especially for anyone who believes they can’t get sober in the party scene.
🎧 If you’re struggling, know that recovery is possible.
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23 February 2026
In this powerful episode of Addicted to Recovery, the hosts welcome Amber, who shares her deeply honest journey through addiction, relapse, mental health struggles, and ultimately finding lasting recovery. Amber
Amber opens up about growing up feeling different and self-conscious, discovering alcohol at a young age, and later developing a dependence on cocaine that quickly escalated from social use into a destructive cycle. She discusses how ADHD, untreated trauma, and the search to feel “normal” fueled her addiction — and how becoming a mother added both love and pressure during her darkest moments. Amber
After hitting emotional rock bottom and seeking help through A&E, Amber entered mental health treatment but struggled because the root issue — addiction — wasn’t fully addressed. Relapses followed, teaching her painful lessons about the difference between simply being abstinent and truly working a recovery program. Amber
Everything changed when she fully committed to meetings, sponsorship, service, and the 12-step process. Through honesty, structure, and community, Amber rebuilt her life — repairing relationships with her daughter, developing confidence, and discovering new ambitions like drama school. Now one year clean, she shares how recovery has given her peace, purpose, and the ability to show up consistently for life. Amber
This episode explores:
A heartfelt conversation about hope, resilience, and what’s possible when someone truly puts “two feet” into recovery.
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16 February 2026
This episode of Addicted to Recovery features Harry, who shares his personal journey through addiction, recovery, and fatherhood. He reflects on growing up in West London, navigating family challenges, and being diagnosed with ADHD at a young age. Despite a childhood filled with love, the absence of a consistent male role model and exposure to a tough “lad culture” shaped his identity and influenced early drinking and drug use. Football became both an outlet and an entry point into environments where alcohol and substances were normalised.
As Harry entered adulthood, his substance use escalated from social drinking to daily reliance on alcohol and cocaine. He describes maintaining work and responsibilities for a time, but eventually falling into patterns of secrecy, financial strain, paranoia, and emotional instability. The pressure of moving house, building a family, and trying to live up to expectations intensified his addiction. Even becoming a father — which he hoped would change everything — wasn’t enough to stop the cycle, and feelings of guilt and shame continued to grow.
The turning point came when Harry reached a severe mental health crisis, feeling overwhelmed and suicidal. He recalls moments of deep despair, including walking alone in a forest and later confronting himself in a mirror, which sparked a powerful realisation that he needed help. This moment led him to attend recovery meetings, where he began the process of rebuilding his life. Through recovery, he learned that sobriety wasn’t just about quitting substances, but about changing his mindset, letting go of ego, and learning healthier ways to connect with others.
Since getting clean, Harry explains how his priorities have shifted towards reliability, honesty, and family life. He talks about becoming a more present partner and father, embracing emotional openness, and redefining what masculinity means to him. Motivated by his own growth, he started a men’s mental-health group called “The Man Cave,” offering a supportive space where men can talk openly about struggles such as anxiety, relationships, work pressures, and identity — not just addiction.
Overall, the episode highlights themes of vulnerability, accountability, and transformation. Harry’s story emphasises that recovery is an ongoing journey of personal change, where learning to drop the mask and ask for help becomes the foundation for a more authentic and meaningful life.
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09 February 2026
In this episode, Christopher White and Max Thomas speak directly to the newcomer — the person who’s struggling, confused, overwhelmed, or quietly asking for help. Drawing from their own lived experience, they break down what addiction actually feels like, why extreme emotions are common in early recovery, and why no feeling — good or bad — lasts forever.
The conversation moves through mental health, physical wellbeing, gratitude, forgiveness, and the power of human connection. Chris and Max also talk openly about meetings, sponsorship, and 12-step recovery, explaining why simply walking through the door can be one of the bravest decisions a person ever makes.
This episode isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about hope, honesty, and reminding anyone listening that you don’t have to be clean, confident, or certain — you just have to show up.
If you’re new to recovery, thinking about getting help, or supporting someone who is, this episode is for you.
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